Finding out - After about five months of casually trying I got a positive pregnancy test. Absolute elation was followed by absolute fear. It all became very real VERY fast. I always knew I wanted to have children and after losing one of my ovaries at the age of 17 I always wondered if it would be difficult to get pregnant. Thankfully it wasn't and seeing the word "Pregnant" on my Clear Blue digital test was about the best feeling I could ever imagine. That feeling was followed by thoughts like...oh my god what have we done? Would we be able to handle this new responsibility? Were we really ready for our lives to change forever? The answer was obviously without a doubt, yes! But those first couple weeks were pretty eye opening.
Morning sickness? Nope, not a day, thank the good Lord above. What I had instead was a heightened state of paranoia. I already loved this baby so much the thought of doing anything wrong really freaked me out. I couldn't get enough information so I would search online and if I had a question or symptom I would consult Google. Bad idea. So bad, in fact, that my husband banned me from certain baby sites that can breed fear. If I had to do it all over again I would say a certain amount of ignorance is the way to go. One really doesn't need to worry oneself with all the vast possibilities of reasons for let's say, cramps.
What to eat? Another breeding field for paranoia. The list of what not to eat (or drink) is long and words like listeria and toxoplasmosis are constantly thrown around. Even though I know I have a greater chance of being abducted by aliens than contracting listeriosis, for my own sanity I have abstained from deli meats, sausage, hot dogs, unpasteurized cheese, etc. Almost all cheese in America is pasteurized but I am still afraid of certain cheeses. Yep, pregnancy paranoia. This article helped me a lot. And this article made me reconsider eating sushi.
Prenatal care. After seeing The Business of Being Born I was sold on giving birth at home. This is common practice in Europe so Ian already felt like this was the way to go for us. After some research I found the most wonderful midwifes at The Sanctuary. Honestly, I cannot say enough about how much I love them. Best decision ever. The OBGYN on staff, Dr. Stuart Fischbein is also amazing. As is the book he co-wrote The Fearless Pregnancy. I only wish I would have read it when I first found out I was pregnant. I have to say I have nothing against hospital births, epidurals or c-sections I just felt like if at all possible I personally wanted to avoid them.
Cravings? Oh yeah. Pancakes for breakfast, pancakes for lunch, pancakes for dinner. I also love a good muffin with a few sips of Ian's coffee (having a bakery/coffee shop downstairs from us is trouble). When I'm not craving sweet I want cheeseburgers and pizza. Since these things are not the best thing for the baby I limit my intake. I also have the vain fear of getting a huge ass. So that keeps me in check (most of the time). Although my constant hunger (which has increased in my second trimester) seems to be working against me.
Body changes. Breasts up (at least) two sizes!! Crazy.
The best part of my first trimester (and one of the best moments of my life so far) was hearing our baby's heartbeat and later that same day seeing our baby for the first time at my 12 week ultra-sound. It had been too early to pick up a heartbeat before then which was stressful, to say the least. I was so relieved to hear the fast swoosh of a heartbeat that day that I burst into tears. Absolutely amazing.
Baby kicks. I first felt the baby kick at about 15 weeks. I wasn't sure then if it was the baby but now that the baby is kicking all the time I know it was indeed. Such an amazing feeling, I really can't get enough.
Boy or girl premonitions. I was convinced we were having a boy, for kind of ridiculous reasons. The first being the lack of morning sickness. When I looked this up online it said no morning sickness meant you were likely having a boy. Then I checked the ancient Chinese gender predictor and it said I was having a boy. I had no telling dreams whatsoever. Ian thought we were having a girl.
Finding out the sex? Oh yeah. Ian wanted to wait, I wanted to find out. I won that one and we found out at our 20 week ultra-sound that we are having a GIRL!!!! So much for mother's intuition, I was completely shocked and completely and utterly over the moon. As was Ian (but he knew all along, sheesh).
Seeing the baby kick. At 21 weeks Ian and I saw my belly move when our baby kicks. Has to be the most amazing thing ever. Again, I can't get enough. Thankfully she is moving a lot everyday.
Sleep. Been no problem for me yet and I've been doing a lot of it. For Christmas Ian got me this pillow. He calls it a dinosaur poop because of the shape and how massive it is (thank god for our king size bed). I also find it comfortable to sleep on my back sometimes. This was another freak out moment when I read you weren't supposed to lie on your back in your second trimester. My midwifes assured me there was nothing to worry about. They reminded me that my body would tell me when to move and that we naturally move when circulation is bad.
I think that puts me up to date. This week I am in my 23rd week and loving every minute of it. Especially now that I'm finally showing a proper bump instead of looking like I've gained weight awkwardly around my midsection. I am working on putting my belly shots all together (so far) to show the progression. Will be posting it shortly.
I would love to hear any questions or comments you have.